Shirley Diefendorf Sommer

Shirley Diefendorf Sommer, 86, of Chapel Hill, NC, passed away peacefully on October 31, 2025, surrounded by her family. 

Shirley was born on May 28, 1939, in Michigan City, Indiana to Robert and Helen Diefendorf. She had an older brother, Robert. The family moved frequently, and as Shirley liked to explain, “My dad was always looking for a better opportunity, so we went where that took us. Each place we lived had special memories for me”. Those places include West Virginia, Pennsylvania, Minnesota, New York and Terrace Park, Ohio. She attended Ohio Wesleyan University and pledged Chi Omega. A phrase in the Chi Omega symphony states one should “be womanly always”, which many would agree was an ideal that Shirley strove to achieve throughout her life. In her sophomore year, she transferred to Miami University, where she graduated with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Psychology. 

Shirley married William (Bill) Sommer, whom she met in Terrace Park, on July 15, 1961, at St. Thomas Episcopal Church in Terrace Park. After tending to the home for a few months, she decided to seek outside employment. She landed a job, of which she was very proud, as a probation officer for juvenile girls in the Butler County Court of Common Pleas. Shirley and Bill welcomed a daughter, Elizabeth (Beth), in 1965. Shirley continued to work part time until Bill found new employment and the family moved to Wilmington, Delaware in 1971. 

In Delaware, she became involved with her neighborhood, with her church community and with the local Chi Omega alumnae association. She played a lot of tennis and planned many visits with extended family throughout Beth’s childhood. Shirley also taught herself to use an original heavy duty Singer sewing machine and started reupholstering the family furniture. Friends learned of her skillful handiwork and “Sommer’s Upholstery” was born. It grew into a thriving home business that she single-handedly ran for 40 years. 

Shirley and Bill were delighted when Beth married Mark Velkoff, and their joy only grew with the arrival of their grandchildren, Andrew and Owen. Shirley and Bill left Delaware in 2005 and moved to Virginia to be closer to their grandchildren. Bill passed away shortly after the move and Shirley filled her time with friends, tennis, travel, knitting, and spending time with her grandchildren. 

In 2014, Beth’s family relocated to The Woodlands, Texas, and Shirley quickly decided to join them there. She found a new church home, volunteered at the local library, and spent many hours “pumping iron” at the YMCA. She celebrated her 80th birthday surrounded by over 60 friends and family! Shirley’s final move was to Chapel Hill when Beth and Mark retired there in 2022. She found another wonderful church home and enjoyed being a member of the knitting group. 

She will be remembered by the many people she knew throughout her life as a woman of enormous heart, who gave endlessly to her family, friends, and the many communities in which she lived. 

The funeral service will take place on Monday, November 17, 2025, at 11am at The Church of the Holy Family in Chapel Hill. In lieu of flowers, the family has requested donations to the Brain Support Network at www.brainsupportnetwork.org/donate, a non-profit organization dedicated to providing comprehensive support and resources for individuals and families affected by neurodegenerative disorders, with a special focus on atypical parkinsonism.